someone called me shannon dorrhety annnd it hurt my feelingsd.
I'm going to an arts college, I live next to the frat houses, and my room number is 420. god has plans for me and I couldn't be happier.
Picking up third year law school girls is like MILF hunting for beginners
So I made him an imaginary sandwich and told him that the day I didn't have to fake it, neither would he.
New drinking game: take a shot everytime Jay-Z is played during the NFL draft.
I just got asked if I have a rule for sleeping with people. Like they have to buy me dinner first etc...
On that note, do I have a rule?
Not quite sure what happened last night. I'll drive your dresser over to you later.....
Did we literally take a cab across the street
its safe to say i can delete the contact in my phone "brandon random bus make out" from spring break right?
I have reached the point in my life where I realized this is what I'm going to do for the rest of my life. Eat, shit , bar, drink, drank, drunk.
Finally better. I had to use eye makeup remover to get the purple wine stains off my lips
it was good sex until i became a rubber doll and he became a jack hammer, so i guess overall it was good
well, the two that sent pics I've already been with, so at least its not just BAM HERE'S MY PENIS IN YOUR INBOX ENJOY THOSE MEGAPIXELS
I don't care how many things you caught on fire, it's still not as bad as doing coke and then filming yourself having sex.
I think I just sharted jello shots
Randomize
