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• (516): View more from New York

  the women in the ladies room did not appreciate my innovation of turning a sink into a urinal

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• (770): View more from Georgia

  my mom just found my flavored lube in the basement. she gave me a lecture about how "giving head is degrading" omg i feel sooooo bad for my dad

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• (817): View more from Texas

  Spent 200 bucks on a stripper for a good night hug. I give up.

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• (609): View more from New Jersey

  I just ate a bag of doritos while taking a shower. I can now officially do anything

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• (215): View more from Pennsylvania

  You slow clapped the stripper last night.

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• (541): View more from Oregon

  I want a burrito.

  (1-541): View more from Oregon

  Truly, you are the voice of a generation.

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• (907): View more from Alaska

  As a plus, I've lost 5 pounds in two days, so "party all weekend" is officially a valid diet plan.

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• (+44): View more from United Kingdom

  There was a huge crash. I came out of my room to find you sprawled out at the bottom of the stairs in your bra and panties. You looked at me, yelled 'WHAT AM I DOING WITH MY LIFE' and then ran back into his room.

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• (781): View more from Massachusetts

  Honestly I was sitting in managerial accounting thinking "I really need to get my shit together and stop drinking so much wine." But when you asked I realized... it's wine. It's always a yes.

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• (301): View more from Maryland

  I'm the only person who goes to break up a friends with benefits and comes out with a boyfriend

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• (970): View more from Colorado

  You let someone poor beer into my mouth off of a balcony. Best friend test failed.

  (1-970): View more from Colorado

  Haahahahahahhaaa

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• (330): View more from Ohio

  Me and my liver are not on speaking terms.

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• (270): View more from Kentucky

  I apparently lifted the young child over my head yelling "Victory!" after that last game of pool, right before doing some Girls Just Wanna Have Fun karaoke.

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• (785): View more from Kansas

  So... I sharted on the plane. It was hard to maintain my composure and acted offended at the same time. I hate you for not cutting me off last night.

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• (570): View more from Pennsylvania

  fyi: first time in five days i havent washed my birth control down with liquor. when are we going out tonight?

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