Is he smart?
Why would i know that. That would deal with the top half of his body. I only deal with the bottom half.
I knew things were bad when I walked in on you feeding juice to your iPhone
one of the RAs is here. he told me his name is optimus prime and then took his shirt off and fell down
History professor is at the bar. Hurry! There's only so many A's he could give before it starts to look bad.
So I'm dropping a fat deuce at work, and the lock on the stall door slips and the door slides open, when suddenly someone comes in. Now I have two options, I can either get up quickly and try to shut the door quickly (not easy to do with one hand) or I can just sit there and play it off like it's no big deal and I always dump at work with the door open. I chose option two, and it was as awkward as it sounds.
I totally intended to come to the hotel, but I woke up in a parking lot
The struggle is real.
I have a high opinion of you, you smash bitches. Respect.
You helped blow my nose... Ok it's safe to say we are on a new level of relationship..
Best ethics paper a stoner could write. I called my professor Dr. Superfly Arandia. And I'm pretty sure I used "respect the hustle" somewhere in there too.
tbh i just wanted to fuck a guy with forearm tattoos but then he was so FORWARD about it
Im legit just salty with everyone who has a penis right now
Remember that cop that blew me in the parking lot a few weeks ago? He's possibly with his wife and kids shopping at Target.
My disney ticket is covered in lube, do you think they will accept it?
girls shouldnt black out with american flag bandaids on their nips
how do you tell someone, in the most complimentary way possible, that they would make an excellent stripper?
Randomize
