I was actually kinda bummed my STD test came back negative.
That would have been proof he'd slept with the stripper. Lame.
Her parents hate her and she's on like major lockdown. All her friends are in jail and she has massive pit stains. Dude... It doesn't get much worse than that.
he suggested i make a website called "cum on molly's face", to "start off my acting career"
some girl had on jean underwear. i hate america.
he rolled over in his sleep, called me a hoe and then grabbed my crotch. some things never change, asleep or not.
this is random but who was banging in the shower in our condo?
I'm cheerleading for traffic. people are staring. Why am i the only high person on the way to class?
So my nipple piercings were only $20 because it's breast cancer awareness month. Fuck yes!
Taking my underwear off at work was one of my better decisions this weekend
You don't know how badly I want to just hold you as a soup spoon holds a bisque
Just got a Snapchat of his dick with the caption 'We miss you.'
That's true love, there.
why are there 3 differently sized panties on our kitchen counter?
I cant miss out on a half day of work without a booty call
its like i just tried to scrub the hangover off of me.
I just got a hug from a random kid in my class. he said I was a champ at the bar last night..someone help me.
Randomize
