ive had 594 apples! thats 99 apples 6 times! math!
Everytime she would start slurring, she'd stop, hold up a finger, wait like 30 seconds, then try again. I love drunk people
and then she said I drew a line on her forehead with my cum and whispered "Simba"
I actually kind of like the booze poos. It's like a colon cleanse. I feel skinnier.
I dont have enough money in my bank account to buy a pregnancy test. this wouldnt be the first time ive had to steal one either...
I never thought your mom would see me throwing up on my hands and knees in your front yard
I'd be there a lot sooner if these damn stairs would stop moving.
Just used the "Buddy" Poppy flower I got from a veteran to clean my one hitter. "I'm proud to be an American"
let’s be honest I’d fucking Irish step dance on your grave, asshole
I seriously doubt this is the first time pumpkin pie has led to a booty call.
The power of the half flaccid cock, and to think, I thought I was just playing accordion in front of her Vagina!
New rule. If he's too busy to put the "H" in "what" then I'm too busy to put his D in me.
There's lube and condom packets all over the street we missed something awesome.
So I'm never gonna get to see you again?
Hopefully.
I'm waiting for you in a manthong right now.
Randomize
