Waldo just asked us for directions. Even he doesn't know where he is.
Listen, i'm watching playoff hockey and eating waffles. i just don't have time for your drama today.
i'm going to look back at this as the time of my life when i casually dated that autistic guy
Strip beer pong in the front yard? Of course the cops showed up
Yeah? Well I'm currently predrinking downstairs in my room by myself. Absolut and water with a hint of mint because I'm using the glass I keep my toothbrush in. Fuck, you bitches better get off work soon.
You're a college freshman. Its your job to be pathetic. And drunk. But mostly pathetic
He's trying to impress me with how much money he makes. How does he know me so well?
I sold weed for gas money to get home. I thought that's what college was for.
No. I'm wrapped up in my sheets like a burrito. Carry me
Excellent idea. Nothing says "congrats for resurrecting yourself, Jesus" like Greygoose at noon!
I cnant read. Cheetos goen. Help. Grt Cheetos.
she's a drunken disney princess. so basically me if i had a crown and no desire for independence.
Love waking up to a new contact named “Pizza” btw
I’m going to have to rewatch all of them. Drugs, man.
I wiped my ass with a McDonalds wrapper. I've hit an all time low. Sorry for my impatience
Randomize
