shes trying to light up her bowl in front of the fan. everytime it blows it out she just gives it a dirty look.
after he came i started crying. just to fuck with his head.
How sober do you have to be to donate blood?
you got us kicked out of the restaurant for trying to pee in the trash can.
Honestly the war on drugs is dumb and you can just sleep in my bed which is mega comfortable anytime you want. There I said it
Out of all the people in the house to show their tits at mcdonalds to try and get free food, they picked those two?
I'd risk everything I own for 10 min naked with her, 2 would be sex and the rest me crying like a little girl.
It's like everything I need in life within a five block radius: booze, toilets, dogs, dicks.
So she was on top of my phone and somehow called my roommate while I banged her. I picked up and he congratulated me. I was with his sister. I will take this to my grave.
Apparently I promised everyone at the party I'd partake in various winter sports with them..
hold on i need to sex proof my eyelashes. thank godd for waterproof mascara
Wanna buy a dildo with me during your lunch break tomorrow?
Im looking at the faintest of claw marks right now. I just fell in love all over again.
I'm sorry, but the bed has won this battle. I got up, changed my shirt, combed my hair, put on some deodorant, and then looked at my bed and got back in
Would the comment "Down Goes Frasier" be too inappropriate at this time?
Randomize
