the more pounds shes got the more points. bonus points awarded for specialty moves used. aka broken cowboy, tobogan, dutch oven, or brazilian fake out.
I got drunk and threw up on a kid at the amusement park. I think they're pressing charges.
He has to watch his girlfriends kitten. Even when she is in Vegas, her pussy keeps him from getting into mine.
You went around chanting "dinosaur period" and drinking tomato soup from the can.
We saluted the chips to the national anthem before cooking them. The house has to get a munchies fryer
I think this hangover is going to kill me. If it succeeds I would like you to read a dramatic rendition of 'Trapped in the closet' complete with interpretative dance at my funeral.
Jacob lost his virginity in a threesome. I am deffs fucking this kid.
DURING A THUNDERSTORM ON HIS BIRTHDAY.
Whiskey and an unstable home life is apparently the fountain that 20-something boys like to drink from.
Nope I went the fuck home like an adult
You walked in wearing nothing but a beekeeper mask
Normal people find beers in their gym bag, right?
Is it ok that I asked him half way through sex why he hadn't accepted my friend request yet?
in fetal position in his closet not sure if he knows im here... hugging his spongebob cake pan i stole.... now please come find me..
My boss is explaining why he thinks time goes by faster and faster. Bc of the rockets. No lie.
I sharted in court today and had to sit on it for about three and a half hours.
Randomize
