we were exchanging secrets last night... she told me about how she put markers in her vaj in middle school. found a keeper.
if I was a wizard from waverly place we wouldn't b having these problems
Waldo just asked us for directions. Even he doesn't know where he is.
Somehow after we left in 3 different cars to all go to different places we still all ended up in the emergency room
Can I have my ID back now or are you using it to crossdress again?
Drunk in my research methods class at 9:30 in the morning. We should do a quantitative analysis of my mimosa consumption.
I am both scared and jealous.
All together there was 318 cigarette butts in the pool... And my microwave.
You throw up behind 1 mannequin and it's world war 3 in forever 21
Drunk Sam makes promises that Sober Sam can't keep
Good news. His dicks gotten wayy bigger since high school. I love Thanksgiving break.
This feels more like a conference of all the people I've fucked in the past year.
Good news my life of crime finally paid off
I had sex on a seadoo on the middle of the lake lastnight
I was trying to decide if i was still high whenever i realized i was pressing the buttons on the microwave cause i liked the sound.
So my best friends wedding ended with everyone seeing me getting eaten out behind the forbes church. Classy!
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