i was puking in the toilet, he walked in and to talk to me and started puking in the sink.. Could this be my perfect man??
I just saw a man vacuming his front lawn. What is this world coming to?
Hey. I found $5 in quarters from one of those state quarter collection books. I'm using it for food tomorrow.
They are making fun of natty and blackberries.
Tell them they are ugly.
It just gets louder and louder too...dear god. Her poor vagina.
I have sand in every orifice, there are bruises everywhere, and I smell like a distillery. I love summer.
She just tried to snort granola up her nose but its ok she's not bleeding.
As an added bonus, you will have a "25 blowjobs a month" voucher, expiring thirty days after the first initial bj.
I have managed to reach the 'after meth poster look' before lunch here...
he shit on the floor last night i'm not venturing down there
I may or may not already be in your hot tub when you get home. I have a key to your house and no shame.
He's super sweet. I feel like I'm dating Elmo. If Elmo had a 7 incher
Anyways, he came over at 3:30 am and ate me out while I ate pizza on the counter
He says it takes a lot to subdue the urge to just bury his face in my vagina. Of course, I have absolutely no problem with this.
No pussy. I don't care what time of year it is you do not look tough wearing sandals. Honestly you look like a high school guidance counselor.
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