just do him I won't tell jon
um i'm guessing you meant to send this to tina, thanks for the support in our relationship you whore
The walk of shame is so much worse when you've spent the night third wheeling.
CAN CRIS ANGEL JUST LOOK NORMAL FOR ONCE?!
There's a girl in here wearing a kaballah bracelet and a miley Cyrus tshirt. consider her judged.
I wrote my name on his balls in sharpie. In the homosexual world that's like a diamond ring. Shits permanent.
Last thing i remember is pounding jager and puking in that nerds george foreman grill. Then i wake up this morning with some random tooth brush in my mouth
i am willing to donate my body to this science experiment when it means free blowjobs
All those movies are bullshit, there is no way to run down a line of parked cars, they`re too far apart. my faces hurts so much right now
Pizza rolls are incredible. They are like sex, except I have them sometimes
First time for everything: started posting a Facebook comment, decided I'm not quite sober enough. Progress.
No we didn't fuck. He picked me up I asked where we were going and he said "I don't know if you've ever heard of a little place called Denny's?" He was completely serious. I told him to stop the car and I got out and called Jack.
do you think that identical twins have the same size junk? i just want to know your opinion before i find out.
I must be really high or they really did just bring me a banana split instead of a burger
U NO SLUT. YOUR HEART IS JUST FREE.
I took advantage of the fact that my mentee had to go to the bathroom to throw up in the other stall. I'm going to hell for being hungover at an elementary school.
Randomize
