i told him that if he starts being sappy its friends = off. he called me jerkface and drew on me w permanent marker. im either in love w him or we are twelve.
At an apparent methhead hillbilly bar and was smiling for a pic when one toothless wonder screamed "look at all them teeth"!
the crunchwrap supreme is the def leppard of the taco bell menu
which is why it's clearly superior
Check if I'm alive tomorrow. If not, tell my parents I died happy and that there's a gay cheerleader in the spare bedroom
My morning has consisted of lying in a fetal position, eating a whole tub of ben and jerry's, talking to my cat, and setting all of our pictures on fire. Does that answer your question?
just had to re-breakup with her. it was like shooting a dead horse that was crying and talking.
You know when you can feel the alcohol in your toes? That's a great feeling.
College has taught me that the "best idea" is rarely the fun one.
This is true but you can't really get fired from college
Middle of vacation, he walked into an audition for a Broadway musical in a drunken stupor. I think he got the part.
My boyfriend's brother just got out of jail and he is already telling us to steal cable. Dude.
I don't give a fuck that he's gay and keeps hitting on me. Free cocaine is free cocaine bro
if you're wondering why I texted you some girl's name at 4 am it's because you wanted to Facebook stalk the girl who gave that Irish guy we met at the Chinese food place her license and said 'call me'
I'm actually pretty sure the amount of alcohol I drank last night erased memories from other times in my life.
Just saw you run by my class yelling "fuck you!". Good luck and stay human!
What does "mood AF" mean?
Mood as fuck.
Why did you comment that on a video of a gorilla throwing its own shit?
Randomize
