By the way, shout wipes are a gift from god for people that throw up on themselves.
Hm. I declare blue a flavor.
i used the pictures of vaginas in your biology book to jack off.
Rule of thumb; if you ask me if my tits are fake you will not get to touch them.
For the record, it's NEVER ok to discuss my stripper-related injuries with my fiance.
Booty calls should never involve the cops.
.It's like gods test of willpower against vaginal comfort
I think weed is turning my hair brown
I'll have a whole suitcase of emergency bacon with me obviously
Coming straight to your house after the flight. If not in Federal Prison for disobeying peanut laws.
A stripper set a mans ass on fire... the club smelled like burning ass and boxers.
dude the dog literally grabbed the condom out of the trash can and threw it in the air i'm screaming
i ran into the Jo the housecleaner earlier this morning. i mentioned i had a little hangover and she asked what the occasion was.. i replied "Tuesday" without thinking. she judged the shit out of me.
That time of your life is like a blur to me. There was churches, car fucking, and conservatives
I'm wearing men's underwear
I don't know what to do with that information...
Randomize
