: south campus drug res life name erik. Love, tran
My lawyer watched my DUI video. Said of the thousand or so he's seen, mine was one of the top ten best.
So i decided to deal with the awkwardness of last night by making out with all three of them
Just joined the godiva rewards club. Who's the fat friend now.
Found him fucking some random drunk chick in the bathrrom at the blue lep with a beer in each hand. had to give him props.
Ill give you a 4 hour blow job if you make my nephew go to bed.
Some random walked into our tent, woke her up and said "Harry Potter must not go back to Hogwarts!"
No. I'm wrapped up in my sheets like a burrito. Carry me
SORRY! Pervert came out for a bit. BAD PERVERT! BACK IN YOUR HOME!
Definitely! I will do that this week. Right now, watching drag queens play with my dad's beard.
Btw his name is Woody. I must be really drunk to think this is a good situation
I'M SORRY THIS WAS SEXTING AND I MADE IT SERIOUS.
Please don't explain what tea bagging is to my mother.
It's alright. I'm just trying to make her realize you're not good enough for her.
I just spent 45 minutes and a really well-put together Power Point trying to convince her to use my dog as baby Jesus in her church's play.
Randomize
