I think I gave almost everyone at that party the clap last night
well on the bright side, he charges $60 for an eighth
so he'll probably take me somewhere nice
Will you push me around in a wheel chair, introduce me to people, and say nothing as I get up and walk away?
the bride at the wedding we just crashed said we can stay only if we strip for her. You need to get down here
she just announce I'm david copper field and tried to shove a napkin down my throat
I took "we live within stumbling distance of the bar" as an invitation and challenge
So maybe I got drunk and hooked up with him in a hot tub? I mean that's nothing to be ashamed of, that kind of takes talent. I'd drown.
Also, if asking a guy to come over and watch curling with you doesn't scream let's fuck then idk what does
Fair warning: I will be throwing corn dogs at you every time I see you this week.
I think even the taco bell employees judged me
I'm setting goals and achieving them. I'd say I'm quite mature for my age.
You're goal was to fuck him and you don't even remember it.
My parents are now taking hits off a joint. Thank you.
Apparently his version of saying "I'm Sorry" is streaking around our apartment building then asking for a blow job.....
Actually I really wish that I was drinking so I could ask him for breakup sex and then later blame it on my alcoholic tendencies. Maybe tomorrow instead.
Xanax, wine, and giving the neighbor blue balls. How about you?
Jesus, it’s Tuesday morning! Not back stage with Motley Crew
Randomize