So you really shouldn't go around telling people you're fireproof
He walked in, tore open the drawer, pulled out a condom, and slammed it shut. He was that ready.
he went to have surgery in the morning and apparently they found lip gloss on his dick
Im in search of the perfect penis, it would be unethical for me not to test run them.
I woke up with glitter in my wounds.
There's a person in my phone named motor boat. I love making new friends.
i told myself when i was 16 i would never fuck an Alan. now i've fucked 3 and i'm punching my 16-year-old self in the face
The worst that could happen is you end up with a black eye and I get laid.. I'm okay with my end of that bargain.
He wants to buy me a drink to apologize for sending me a pic of his dick. Welcome to my life.
Get up, biotch, before I come traipsing in there to rip apart whatever god-forsaken spoon you have going on between the two of you and your dog.
bought even stevens on dvd and enough weed and pizza bagels to last us a week.. ready to get snowed in?
Jus pulled over and stole. Corn out of a. Field. ... get on my level
So far 2 of my professors caught me looking at their dicks
idk but im stoned n hiding in the bathroom from my kids with a really big bowl of really little candy bars
I didn’t spend $100 for a wax to sit here and listen to you FT your brother to complain about how bad the Jets are.
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