I am watching Grease 2 and properly learning how to apply a condom to a banana. This is a sign from God that this is the closest I will ever get to having the need for one.
just cuze she's 16 doesn't mean it's illegal to add her on facebook
you decided to have a spaghetti fight but then you got greedy and decided to eat it all.
Is it sad that when she told me he has a small peen I felt like it made us more compatible?
i keep seeing random pieces of my outfit all around town.
And for the fourth year in a row Christmas has ended in tears, yelling and me drinking. This is officially our longest running Christmas tradition.
Spent 200 bucks on a stripper for a good night hug. I give up.
But it's not about our feelings, it's about making the men we sleep with feel awful about their lives
Seius question. Does a penis floar when ina baht? Must find out.
I made him ride the giant pony statue in my friends little sisters room before i let him get in the bed.
I'm in this weird masturbatory haze making onion rings. If you want to come over we can eat these suckers and play TF2.
Why don't we hang out more often?
Is it bad that I'm tracking my period with Instagram pictures?
Will keep you updated on the sexual orientation of my new guy
Valentine's Day is now to be known as Tacos and Orgasms Day.
I'm pretty sure I naked in my first year of college more than I was as a baby.
Randomize
