We didn't go..parents came home with patron wanting to play drinking games --we asked no questions
not allowed to tweet this cos she's following me but i definitely just got head in a stairwell of the university of chicago. wanted you all to know.
Now that I'm 21, I feel like I'm letting North Dakota down by not being drunk everyday
stayed up to watch the sunrise..saw an albino taking shots on the quad..it's like there's a whole new world of people out there just waiting to meet us
Fourth time I had to be woken up in the line of Whataburger in two weeks. First time my shirt was free of vomit.
ive penciled you in for a day of excessive drinking
Either I'm paranoid or I swear my parents rigged my house so you can never sneak in or have the munchies without being loud.
I might have beaten my fastest all time record going from "I really really like this girl" to "fuck that bitch"
Note to self: don't practice nerdy white girl dance choreography in the company bathrooms no matter how nice the huge mirrors and lighting are.
I could see myself being this awkward weirdo drunk girl that patted strangers and danced terribly but was powerless to stop it
when in doubt, mount your coworker in the staff room.
You grabbed my shirt and said, "hope you're not attached" and ripped it off before I could answer you.
i was really depressed when i left the health dept this morning after i had to write a higher number next to "partners" than "age"
I know you're here! I can hear your phoneeeee. Wake up and do illegal things with me.
not even sure this counts as hungover but like my body can't exist in reality today
Randomize
