yo i just woke up i feel so weird, and the absolut is still fill, so is the 30, what the fuck did we drink last night man? And will you please come out of the bathroom.
Bro... we didn't even hang out last night??
i just googled 'classy porn'. high, low, i dunno i just got bored of cum shots.
Hey was my sperm eye the same day I crapped myself?
So I just went to student health services and on my way in there was a girl outside on her phone saying "I just dont want you to be angry" and on my way out she was saying "I have the side effects sheet right here" Someone started the semester off classy
just dropped my bong into 7 pieces, and carried the glass shards around my house. dad saw the blood dripping down my arms, and asked if i slit my wrists. way too high to laugh at this.
Just learned how to deliver a baby.the things i saw tonight can never be unseen
i just wanna lock my vagina in a safe filled with bandaids and healthy things
Pushiiing vjews 4 ma daz caik
Lyk hr kuds 4
I punched some guy in the face for being an asshole then later I went to say sorry and give him a hug and he started making out with me. How was your new years?
We got naked and peed in the garden. Something about bonding with our new house
Future roommate keeps sending me pictures of cool shit she has for our dorm and I'm just like "... I have a set of Aggie wine glasses a great set of tits."
You're not horrible. Thank you for my pandas.
He invited to drink but spelled forties wrong so no thx
Its only once in a life time you get to pick your vcard swiper up from jail
I told him to not try to hang out with me ever again and now I regret it Bc im bleeding through my uterus and just want him to suck on my aching nipples
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