well, atleast the road to alcoholism is fun.
I wrote a list of all my homework due in the next few weeks. I feel I've done enough for tonight.
Don't worry we didnt bang. Sometimes I just bring guys home so I don't order pizza.
Well if all fails we can always become surrogate mothers. I hear that pays well.
It's like split custody, only he's not a kid and they have sex with him.
I feel like jumping into a breast pit right now. Like the old school ball pits at mcdonalds.
I look like one classy bitch running in heels through my backyard while carrying a small dog and a large bottle of booze. How am I still single?
Seems like you've kicked summer 2012 off well.
I can taunt you with whatever I want. Like batman and sex.
I'm sorry, you might have to start setting aside some time in your day for my pussy.
Can we talk about how i am holding a tupperware container of my own puke in the back of my grandparents car while my sister drives
Why didn't you tell me I was calling her by her sisters name all night?
I'm to the point where I'm fantasizing about Iron Chefs going down on me.
so in addition to the two guys I slept with last night, and the third that I turned down this morning, a fourth has appeared. best Valentine's Day ever.
oh i see... well this is a positive first step in you courting him for sex.
She should be a lawyer. She convinced her husband to give her a hall pass AFTER he walked in on her in bed with her ex-bf
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