Trimmed my pubes and broke your paper shredder. Separate events.
She looked kinda like Mario Batali?
So, just so you know... Your vasectomy worked.
bonus
pretty sure i saw you masturbating on chatroulette a minute ago. yes, i can recognize your cock
I THOUGHT I SAW YOU
Do they take checks?
Did you really just ask me if you could write a check for a DRUG DEAL?
But I thought everyone had breakup sex?
you set the microwave for an hour telling me that the done sound was your alarm.
There are fucking limits. Jerking another guy off in the bar toes the line.
my head gets it he sucks but my LAME FUCKING HEART IN MY VAGINA doesnt
Dad just showed up on someone else's golf cart, filled an ice chest with booze and left while yelling "SHINANIGANS!!!!" this is going no where fast.
He wanted to drink hypnotic from my butt crack. I need to move out this state.
I'm making him come over again tonight. I don't know how long this thing will last so I want to spend as much time with his dick as possible.
This is my gift to your gina
I feel fine lol. I tried climbing a tree but the branch broke and I got arrested.
I sent her a dick pic and used brett Favre's dick pick. She asked me why I had pictures of old men's dicks saved on my phone... I just can't win bro
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