She had hickeys... what's up with that?? HAHAHA
do you remember wearing her cheetah rainboots and making bacon shirtless?
We'll cross that bridge when we come to it... Or burn it. Either way we'll deal with it later
Toga everclear = hospital visit... Im sure the paramedics hate me right now
Everyone knows relationships are a winter sport
The other. Cat spoke to me and left. This shit is laced
The first cat might save me but they are taking out masks
no one was sober enough to set up jenga so we just threw the pieces at the last person to drink
He made me eat donuts off his dick. donuts, jen. DONUTS.
Well for starters, her tits were hairy.
javelin tossed one of my crutches in to the mosh pit at the concert, hit some dude in the temple hahah fuck him he sucks
I want to wear Christmas sweaters with you.
He's taking me to Tao. This is going to be so weird. How do you go on a first date with a guy that has seen you naked more times than clothed?
He just showed up on my porch naked with just a blanket and a trash bag
Had a dream I dropped the L word and immediately threatened to kill myself
You probably shouldn't be having nightmares about expressing affection
She walked up to me and whispered "I hope you're good at sex" and led me to the beach.
Randomize
