So she farted while we were having sex but I was afraid she would stop because she was emberessed so i just went ahead and took the blame and apologized
Having an 'SDSU Mom' sticker is just like say 'Hi, my daughter has an std"
plan parent hood is for high school, im at the abortion clinic, so college.
his dog just threw up on me too. its like im a throwup magnet to that family.
All I know is I had a penis in one hand a bottle of wine in the other
Found out that no one else got Christmas bonuses...and you said nothing good could come from sleeping with my boss.
Wow thanks 4 throwing jello at me an yelling who invited that guy to all the guys at the bar
my boss told me he would look for my wallet when he went back to the strip club tonight.
Just got outta the drunk tank! Happy 21st birthday!
Question: should I be considering heels or is this the kind of night where I should plan on falling on my face regardless of my choice of footwear?
Gotcha. How bad is it?
Well to compare it to something I would say it what's that walls would like inside the primate exhibit at the zoo after a group of monkeys finished throwing feces at each other all afternoon
doing squats while I brush my teeth.. gotta keep the booty in check
I swear, I make more use of my creative writing major with sexting than I do with anything else
Does anyone remember last night? Because I still don't know why I now own a goldfish and a ceiling fan made of pizza?
We were having sex and he started doing some weird swivel move. I was like wtf and he said sorry just trying to pop my knee.
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