just looked at his mug shot... not really my type
Maybe you should go over there and lead him on and reach down his pants like he's about to get some and yank his balls.
That's the best idea I've heard all day.
Wow thanks 4 throwing jello at me an yelling who invited that guy to all the guys at the bar
Make sure you take the apple pie out of your pocket before you pass out.
He told me i had to sleep under his bed. He said it would be my castle.
They called me at 5 AM saying they had a present for me
Question: rebounding with your exboyfriend over your rebound guy is healthy right?
I have a cracked rib, no way in hell I'm bottoming for him tonight!
So he came on my stomach this morning and I totally forgot about it until after you poured that body shot.
I tried smoking while wearing a horse mask, it was the worst thing I've ever smelled
I have a sixth sense for large penises and lack of morals
What kind of sociopath goes to sleep at 9pm when I clearly need attention
I stopped telling people I'm a pansexual unless they ask first, really tired of explaining what that means.
Adulthood is putting your bongs in the dishwasher because you're too lazy to clean them manually.
Are you ok dude?
Santi's no longer allowed to buy booze in my lane. Last thing I need is a midlife crisis looking at his Id again.
Randomize
