when your hometown is famous for abortion clinic bombings, hurricanes, and jude law's newest bastard, its probably time to move.
What wine goes with Cap'n Crunch?
she was dressed as a doctor claiming that after she was done i would have a "permaboner"
And then he said "good night girls" and kissed each one before I put my shirt back on
pop tarts are not kleenex
I drunkenly sent a picture of my scrotum to the entire baseball team last night
So does it count as really great road-head if he ran over 3 mailboxes before realizing he was off the road?
I want to spend time with you, and by time, I mean real time. Not your dick in my mouth time.
Have you ever tried running while drinking 151?
The great thing about vietnam is that if I'm drunk during the day people just think I'm being white
We're bowling witha frozen turkey in the hallway...ur missing out
Id have to say flaming beer pong was a royal success.
I'm at a bar where I literally walked in to the bathroom and some chick told me to never go to San Joaquin state pen
I think I might be harboring a Canadian in my womb.
I'm just gonna back away slowly and come back when there's less weird crap.
Randomize
