but i am gonna have to have sex w/ him again to get my earrings back
i just heard my neighbor say from outside my window "i don't give a shit what he does, what the hell am i gonna do with my son's penis?"
he clicked a button a stirrups came down from the ceiling... if I don't come home by sunday, report me.
you woke me up in the middle of the night to tell me you were taking off your pants and it was not an invitation.
come over, blizzard of oz party. dress up.
I was just compiling a top 5 blowjobs list and that's in there for sure.
after last night my drinking related hospital bracelet collection is up to 13
Okay, quick math test. If our entire group can do at least 6 shots a night, how much alcohol will be needed to keep us shit faced for the rest of the week? This is for a grade. Anddd, go.
He may only be 25% black, but after that sexual experience I am 100% never going back.
I just tried on my "outfit" for tonight and I should just wear sweatpants and a sign on my face that says I like it in the ass. That would be more comfortable
Can't we have real sex instead of you just thrusting the air near me?
We all have to be good at something. Mine are writing, drinking, fucking and peer pressure.
The saddest thing about graduating is that we won't have free access to STI screening anymore
I gave you chlamydia, you gave me a concussion. Now we're even.
New rule. If he's too busy to put the "H" in "what" then I'm too busy to put his D in me.
Randomize
