Masterbating to gospel music is like god cheering on your orgasm
i'm not going because i feel like it's just gunna be a "this is your life" who i banged this years addition
Well ya in hindsight obviously offering the cop a jello shot was a bad idea
She's more of a "I'm gonna get herpes no matter how great her face looks like" pretty
I got mine. It's a truly beautiful penis. Plus he pulled his tongue muscle on my vagina.
she screamed "gravy"!!! in the guys face and then stole the very large mans food in line ahead of us... that was just the beginging of the police report.
My only regret is not throwing up on the conveyor belt in the dining hall
It feels like im being cuddled by a thousand little smurf vaginas
WAIT DID YOU MAIL ME A KITTEN
I miss you too. And it was nice meeting your brother while I was mounting you
I'm gonna write a book one day about how to be the less attractive person girls settle for after getting dumped. I will send you a copy
there's a girl on facebook trying to buy me a pizza. I can't say no... right?
I think my pussy is going to freeze to the ground
I found a used condom in my purse this morning. It was in there with a bunch of smushed french fries.
Is it good porn? Or is it more of that fucked up Cabbage Patch Doll porn you made us watch
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