After I talked about my ex for about twenty minutes, she just listened, sluts are so understanding
I never doubt that you might be drinking at any moment.
Its like we are women, and boise state is a gangster rap song. This game is degrading
So, just so you know... Your vasectomy worked.
bonus
the bride spent most of the night apologizing to people she had punched earlier.
We're trying to see who can drink the most and still be eligible to donate blood tomorrow.
i understand you have values and thats awesome, all i want to help you do is forget about them breifly
Yep. My memoirs will be called "A Slore Worth Mentioning"
Have you ever come so hard that right after you have the urge to yell "make me a sandwich!"? ...I think my ovaries turned into testicles.
He yelled "I'm Bruce Springsteen!" when he came. This is why I don't sleep with guys from Jersey.
never planned on seeing last weekend's one night stand again, much less be on the same plane as him..
Me my naked body. You bring the paints. I expect to be a panther by game time Sunday.
What do I get.
Panthers win you get to fuck the paint off me.
I went home with him again and he LEFT HIS OWN HOUSE at 2 in the morning while I was IN THE BATHROOM.
Finally got with the virgin.
Yeah? Howd that go?
As soon as I got it all the way in, I looked deep into her eyes and said "your soul is mine" in the deepest voice I could make. She was not amused.
I'm eating dinner with his parents and my phone goes "MOVE BITCH GET OUT THE WAY!" Thanks.
Randomize
