I would blow Magic Johnson for a pack of lucky strikes right now. Post-hiv.
Well maybe next time you won't tell me to do whatever I want.
sorry i was making out with matt didn't mean for it to sound like that. there was no tone
there should be a new saying, don't text and tongue
Toga everclear = hospital visit... Im sure the paramedics hate me right now
I wanna take him on a special date, something that says I banged your brother but since he moved I want you
Announcement: Given the sad circumstances regarding the death of my dearest friend Chong the Bong, there will be a brief memorial service for him tomorrow evening at 10:30 at my place. After sharing some memories and sending his spirit off to the great bowl in the sky, we will all take place in the commemoration and maiden voyage of his son, Chong Squared, who eagerly waits to meet all of you. High blessings to you all, piece be with you.
After she saw a msg in his phone from me that listed the reasons why I love his cock, I don't think I can deny fucking her ex.
it's a drink the shower water kind of morning ...
I have 39 hot sauces from Chipotle
It's like earning obesity badges
there's a drunk hobo under the bridge wearing a jester hat and screaming at women
No I have an idea, I saw you running through the neighborhood at 3am while I searched for my flip flops in a ditch
You're like Jane Goodall in a forest of gay men. Someday your autobiography will be called "Bottoms in the Mist".
Like I respect him so much I would suck his dick
In a very non respectful way
I'm making myself the patron saint of bisexuality
Sorry I didn't call this morning. Ended up with a decorated war veteran last night who besides finding the enemy, KNEW where the fuck my G spot was. He gets a medal in my book!
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