i hope you realize when i said "grib" earlier i was referring to the gridded binary, a mathematically concise data format commonly used in meteorology to store historical weather forecast data. also meant in referential conjunction to my probability math class that i am failing at roughly 215pm tomorrow afternoon.
i woke up with socks on this morning
so?
i didnt wear socks last night
The guy in front of me in Sociology is definitely working on my farm in farmville. Never met him before. Do I thank him?
his name is not nearly as fun as i thought to yell out in bed
Correct me if I'm wrong, but I did not stop moving last night. If tequila gives me that extra push to have an active lifestyle, so be it.
i'm gonna start fucking more girls with asthma. help feed my ego.
Why am I the only one concerned that there's a dog in the movie theatre?
i climbed out of the bath tub this morning and found him taped to the treadmill
Now all we have to do is pretend we haven't seen each other naked. Work tomorrow is going to be FUN.
you're going to have to hot glue me into my dress tonight. there's no way out.
And I'm only telling you that because I really wanted to use 'my boyfriend' and 'dick biscuit' in the same sentence.
The whole bar erupted and in happiness and confusion as I went on about pancakes.
I can't ever look his wife in the eye again. She will see right through my soul to his dick pic.
I was going to be upset with you on moral grounds but then i realized free chocolate was involved
Somehow I don't think offering me edibles is what dad meant by checking in on me
They're the hard candy kind!
Randomize
