Apparently every Tri-Delt knows what I did and I am blacklisted from ever dating anyone in that house.
Well ya you lied, told her you cared, took her virginity and then broke up with her at Christies Toy Box.
I honestly thought the dildo was a nice parting gift.
I'm proud of us, I'm cleaning up the place and I haven't found a single beer can that isn't empty.
oh and if she happens to say anything about a cantalope and tissues... just go with it
He's drinking red wine in a margarita glass. He couldn't be more perfect for me.
He's like my sex unicorn. Elusive and majestic. I'll catch him, I'm baiting with patron.
Hey! I was tired. I threw up in two parking lots yesterday.
Idk. Each time I ask him about double teaming a woman with Dennis Rodman he just giggles. We will never know what to believe.
woke up outside on the porch naked surrounded by beer cans with a towl around my neck. i must be in heaven cause i've never seen this place before.
5 am booty call.. And I went I need to gain better control of my vagina
Remember when you fed me goldfish while I was -inside- of someone?
Sometimes I feel like I should become a beautician purely for my ability to shave pretty shapes into my pubic hair.
I sliced my fucking arm open last night after margarita madness and had to drive myself to the ER. Got six stitches and a social worker came in and asked if I was abused due to my sex bruises. I literally had to tell her "don't worry, I like it rough"
I totally OverDed on K2 last night. I felt like I was made of lead and then I had a panic attack.
I haven't had to masterbate since I started dating him over a year ago. I don't even know if I remember how and my vagina is calling.
I knew she was the one when we had sex to the halo soundtrack.
Randomize
