He's so far in the closet he's in Narnia
I dont like him- his parents were home and he hid me in his closet like anne frank
I finally had kitchen counter sex! i was so excited
Do u kno any dealers?
I've officially lost all respect for you, dad.
then you put baby powder on the bottom of your feet and walked to your room so "ladies would follow the footprints"
I sang again at the bar lastnight I don't think alanis morrset knew when she wrote you outta know that the drunk version was going to be go fuck yourself Josh and Chelsea. I love $2 wells.
I'm going on a valentine's date with the random guy i hooked up with in the bar bathroom this weekend...i feel like julia roberts
Dude. There's gotta be an article in Cosmo about it cause I've had three different girls tongue tickle my brownie this month.
He's upstairs shouting 'FUCK OFF I'M IN MY MOTHERFUCKING ZEN ZONE' out of the window.
So I stappled myself into my toga... that should be interesting getting out of later tonight...
If you need to be the damsel in drunken distress make sure it's before 3.
bought even stevens on dvd and enough weed and pizza bagels to last us a week.. ready to get snowed in?
So... In conclusion, do I bring my vibrator and risk not only having it getting taken out at security, but also exposing my dad to my neon green vibrator, or just leave it here?
Yeah you'd pretty much be ruined if you broke up with a guy like that and then had to return to the dating pool
How do I word.. " hey, I need you to fuck me really hard and see if you or I can feel my birth control. No worries, this is just an experiment." In a nice way without them feeling used.
Randomize
