Text me right after you finish, I want to know how the ghetto fleshlight worked out
How about I just call you while I'm doing it so you can hear my reaction?
i can't help myself.. i am just so in love with the kitchen manager.
...he was wearing JNCO shorts.. i'm pretty sure i saw the dragon.
there's no food at this bar, but i'm pretty sure vodka is made of wheat so i'm basically drinking bread.
Maybe its all the xanax she takes but she literally has NO shame
We need to reprogram your vagina to say "no"
Only thing I got out of his drunken Spanish is something that sounded like "pencil sharpener." Damn rosetta stone.
Now if u will excuse me I have to go prep my vagina for this amazing sex filled weekend I'm about to encounter
Drinking a pint every 8 mins right now. Power hour aint shit.
Good luck
Trying doe a second hour and I.cant open my eyes
Exactly. Stay back and unsubscribe from her
The best thing about this time of year is that all I have to do is add a random mardi gras decoration to my cart full of alcohol and boom, no more judging
Pretty sure we ruined a bachelorettes life last night
UPDATE: THERE IS ASS EATING. I REPEAT: THERE IS ASS EATING.
not sure if actually covered in glitter or just drunk
See I am maturing. I just got in from my DRIVE of shame......
you need to drop off my dinner before you go see him because i'm not gonna wait until you're finished fucking him to get my damn chinese food
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