I like it. Barfy the gin-flavoured Assman
JoAnns office is warmer than mine. . .it must be because she has the gateway to hell under her desk.
found the other keg... it's in the tree
remember earlier when I said I was over sex with random boys? take it back take it back take it back
just found his boxers balled up inside my tights, hidden in my freezer. damn i love college.
oh and if she happens to say anything about a cantalope and tissues... just go with it
I'm at the gas station where we got beef jerky and condoms. The fact that those two are in the same sentence makes me love you more.
i just added no after every hockey player in my phone..
I'm just going to eat until there's an actual reason why he wouldn't want to fuck me.
That sad moment when even your drug dealer lands a summer internship and you don't...
I really couldn't care less what she looks like. That's why The Lord Our God gave us doggy-style.
We don't have paper towels so I microwaved a spinach/egg sandwich thingy wrapped in toilet paper. Toilet paper. so that's how my day started.
i just took a huge shit in old main. i think my college bucketlist is finished.
I was actually kind of excited. I mean, how many people can say they've been question by the CIA?
You date? I thought you just hooked up with your TAs
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