I just gave head in the laundry room on campus. He said it was one of the best moments in all of history. Take that, neil armstrong.
I turned down free cocaine. I both respect and regret and that decision.
You can't keep basing your relationship off of the fact that you both love ramen noodles
her boyfriend dumped her for my exgirlfriend. so filming our hookup is pretty much a definite.
There is a visibable outline from you in the grass. its you in the fetal position...
There is a girl in my drunk limo who hasn't seen an uncircumcised penis. Hook me up with a picture.
No more vodka shots for you. Last night you begged a man on your knees to sell you his beard. He had no beard.
I think I have a bro crush.. When I imagine him, I imagine him waking up to go take a shower and just finding three bitches making out waiting for him. Like that awesome.
I just meant the frequency of your blow jobs on a flow chart wouldn't look too promising
I think he just tried to put your boyfriend in a trashcan....
I'm sorry your Amazon says buttplugs now
Plus my fingers were hella swollen from eating all these cured meats so it was like I was given it to her with Hulk Hands on
The notary thing was a good idea. I can charge $2 per signature. I'm currently being paid in beer.
he was wearing a pyjama shirt under a dress shirt under a hoodie under a robe under a rain poncho the man was prepared for anything
She pooped on me during a reverse cowgirl. And it wasn't a little bit either.
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