But i did once see a show where a women was homeless and installed a stove in a school bus so she and her baby could live there since all the seats were taken out. As far as being homeless goes it didn't look half bad...So this is me promising to you that if i ever am living in an abandoned school bus...i will at least pimp it out with a stove so you can come over for dinner sometimes
there was a guy here who managed to get his head stuck in a fishbowl. no, I don't fuckin know how
Dude, I just spun my iPhone on my boner without it falling off. I belong in cirque du soleil.
That's ok. I found a crab leg in my bed and have no pants on.
1. my parents still have sex. 2. being a screamer runs in the family. 3. so much so that i can tell what number of orgasms she's on. 4.so looks like i'm stuck outside a while
I kinda remember trying to staple rolls of toilet paper to make a pillow, but it's blank after that.
Woke up under the lifeguard stand sleeping next to mitch our homeless friend. I bartered a summer wardrobe for his last 5 dollar to buy a bfast sandwich. Bring clothes
Just so you know, if you are not feeling well today it's cause you drank a gatorade bottle full of highlighter fluid.
i can feel the knowledge leaking out of my brain
replace it with alcohol - nature abhors a vacuum
Will you judge me if i do shots in my basement closet first? No? Okay good
I would say I miss her friendship, then I remember that she gave 4 guys the clap. I'm good.
the dude in the apartments across the street got a video of me railing blake on your front steps last night
shit like this is why i dont let you drink vodka anymore ..
No. I'm sorry but once your "would go gay for" list exceeds five people, you're bi. Get over it.
His wife isn’t coming to the wedding! I’ve got 48 hours to home wreck him. Gotta go, I have to shave my vajayjay and buy some really slutty underwear. Love you!
I’d say they were worth it. He screamed “your tits are fanfuckingtastic!”while he was cumming
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