the fundamentals of my vasectemy are strong
i think blowjobs on the first date are perfectly acceptable. as long as you dont go dick to mouth.
I wasn't excited about it either, but if I was going to have her take a load on her face, role playing as some french dude is the least I could do
Every time my boyfriend threatens to commit suicide I change my relationship status as "widowed".
She carries her pencils in a crown royal bag... Need I say more?
are you aware you chucked your pizza at a girl's face after the bar last night?
underwater hpnotiq shots? sure why not.
My google searches from last night: tetanus shot rabbit bite, Bacardi gluten free
Just had a tranny complement my outfit. Looks like I'll have to change before we go out.
Jen gave my number to some guy she met in NY. He sent me a picture of his weiner. He had nice shoes. I replied with a pic of bacon.
When in doubt always reply with bacon.
If she has AMC, I may have to fuck her today. I want to catch up on the walking dead.
Dude, did you know, your blood is contaminated with over 17 non-beer fluids?
I wish they would just make alcoholic protein shakes already.
Just heard him in the middle stall. Sounded like someone emptied a toolbox into the toilet.
Dude, no, you tried to sleep on the stove. I mean. You were pissed when I stopped you... but I couldn't have you catching on fire in my house.
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