I can tuck mytits in my pants
drinking colt 45 because lando calrissian told me to
Her brother was practicing the clarinet....it was like having sex in a starbucks
no seriously. she's even got the premier of the real L word on her calendar at work. that lesbian.
at that time a 4 pound meatball stuffed with pizza rolls seemed more important than bailing you out of jail.... sorry.
We found a swing set....it's in the front yard.
Lightning struck the tree right outside of her window as I came inside her. I think its God's way of saying go by plan b.
Haha, apparently they frown upon male strippers there. Bouncers couldn't catch me tho.
The ONE weekend I don't put anything up my nose, and it decides to bleed like crazy
When I am this hungover I become increasingly grateful for having my own private office
I had a meltdown and you quoted Puddle of Mudd to me
So, anyways, aside from wanting to seduce my roommate for booze, how's everything been
So was this before or after he cried about trump?
After
i pushed adam in a shopping cart for 15 blocks, then we realized we left tyler downtown
did you go back and get him?
nah we went to a karaoke bar instead, so worth it
I think my brain is throwing up inside my head. How do you live like this?
Randomize
