I'm so bored and have no one to sexy text
i was so high last night while i was driving i felt like i was riding a bike with no pedals
the teacher just ate a hash brownie and passed out on the bus best field trip 2010'
So High I just made Cadbury Coffee. I don't know what it is yet, but it involves Cadbury Eggs and coffee.
at what point last night did we decide it was okay to let me hitch hike to another bar?
He shoved his balls through an egg carton and showed us a picture. They were surprisingly egg-like.
He told me my butthole was like "Narnia" and that it's a wonderful place he would like to visit.
He told me he wanted to sober fuck the shit outa me... I took that as a compliment
Delivery driver perk #327: I just paid for part of the security deposit on my new place in pizza. This oughta be a fun renting experience.
He was dressed as a cowboy and he was dancing with my ex roommate. So I took his gun and pistol whipped him with it..then somehow we still slept together..
You want to groom your chest hair? You mean with a little baby chest hair brush? Because that sounds adorable.
the last time I drank tequila I ended up riding your skateboard nude down the street... so yeah, I'll have a few shots.
Well if YOU HAVE TO KNOW, we're laying across the street from the bar on that grassy hill trying to see who's she's with at the bar.
with the way the semester is going, being a stripper is starting to sound better and better everyday
Im going to seductively wisper "that butters my biscuit" in your ear
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