she thought the capital of kansas was topanga.
The Swedes wanted a tensome.
it was a whole new experience in the world of ball fondling
Yes, but if I hadn't gotten here early, I never would have seen the butch lesbian midget waddling down stairs from the bar. Worth every minute of drinking alone.
No. He burped at a 3 year old, roared at him and proceeded to scream at the kid's parents to watch their child. The manager of Olive Garden was on our side.
i was in burrito mode and too drunk to move. no fucks were given. none.
my last clear memory of the night was being offered a shot but having so much alcohol in my hands that someone literally had to pour it in my mouth for me. after that it pretty much skips to waking up face down and shirtless on my floor.
Not sure. He doesn't know where New York is on a map but he gives an incredible spanking.
Who cares about New York?
id like to think im the only pot dealing prostitute that is also an ordained minister. but maybe not. what a time to be alive
It's not as funny as it sounds. I shit myself at the company Christmas party.
If dispatch calls for us tell them I'm having a significant emotional event in the restroom
He ran out to tell us that somebody flooded the bathroom, then went back in there fell on his ass and asked why the floor was wet
You need to get a passport so we can carry our bad decisions over the border
Next time I think it’s a good idea to hook up with any of your wife’s family members or friends just kick me in my dick
I CAN’T BELIEVE YOU STUCK YOUR DICK IN CRAZY!
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