I love watching others lives come down to our level.
The guy at the liquor store just checked my id and said "oh it's you"
Im forcing mysellf to pee so i can fit more margaritas in me...
who paints a picture of their own dick and sends it to people. i dont know if its borderline crazy or just fucking genius...
I want to be ashamed of the things we do this weekend
i think we should start 2012 by becoming clean and sober for awhile and buckle down
ppsyche im wasted where are you
You're an asshole. I don't want your dick as my background. I'll look like I have a thumb fetish.
The sad part is that if I don't get a random pic of your balls or ass or both every month, I start to worry that we're not friends anymore
I'm to the point where I'm fantasizing about Iron Chefs going down on me.
I round house kicked her emotions in the face
It's official. I'm gonna fuck hot art class guy. But this won't be like hot Samsung guy. I'm gonna make sure I follow through this time.
It was a blast. I was going to say that throwing up in the airport bathroom wasn't classy, but it's classier than quietly puking into a fast food cup while in your seat during takeoff...
I knew I was in for a long night after I filled the empty pinata carcass with beer, bit off the top of one of it's legs and used it as a beer bong.
Dude I pissed in her little brother's closet and when I tried to flush the doorknob her parents came out and saw me standing there naked, no more ambien for me
Scary. I hope people take me seriously. Maybe I should black out less to be sure
Randomize
