i hope your v-card owns a pair of floaties
Can I use cash for clunkers to trade in her boobs for a new set of 18 year old tits?
Its worth a shot.
Do you ever look at a vegetable and think "that would be awesome to shove up my vagina"?
im too high. i could barely wash my hair, let alone handle a whole shower
THERE IS PRACTICALLY A BEER FUCKING WATERFALL
I don't think my prof knows we've noticed her No Bra Fridays.
He brought a jar of pickles to the party. So now I've had beer, animal crackers, AND a pickle since noon.
Just saw him riding in a basket on the front of a bike trying to feed the other guy beer. He screamed 'PARTY BIKE BITCHES!' at me as they rode past.
I lied. He's hitting on a drag queen now. Should I rescue him or take pictures?
So, your mugshot picture is behind the counter at B-Dubs, with the caption: "not allowed on premesis."
I barely remember the girls that I got pregnant, you think I'm gunna remember the ones that played handball
Kid got so high from the brownies he forgot his own name. Welcome to college.
You had to dry your pants with the hand dryer in the bathroom because you "forgot to take it out."
I'm SO high. And there is so much pudding in this car
I just tried to snap you a picture of the CVS where we decided not to become parents.
so horny i almost want to text him..and then i remember the restraining order i have against him
Randomize
