You do realize the lyrics aren't "hold me close TONY DANZA" right?
You can't be serious.
Oh please, I could turn a Vienna Boys Choir concert into a shit show
you spent the night getting lap dances from a stripper with a c-section scar then ended up at a one room casino by the airport and you say you're too good to blaze and see pirahna 3d? bullshit
You were screaming across the bar "BUYING US SHOTS ISN'T GOING TO MAKE US STRAIGHT, YA KNOW!!!!!!!!"
I just brushed my teeth. In the car. With watered down Sprite. From Saturday. Multi-tasking at its finest.
Im cutting you off tonight ONE boy at a time
I just remember dedicating a shot to me giving you head so it was obviously a good night
She thinks I'm afraid I'm gonna get caught in one of my lies and some of the girls I'm fucking will find out about each other. But it would be a relief to offload a few from the old crop and work in a few newbies into the rotation. The organization could use some new blood.
We bought a pool from walmart at 2am...and to make matters even more white trash we headed to Applebee's for half off appetizers and corona-ritas
What am I doing with my life
Sleeping with dudes who have peacocks apparently.
I will be there. invited or not. I go where the pancakes go.
Stay strong! Remember we're too uncoordinated to be strippers to make money instead of being a nurse
I want to eat a stick of butter
Did your pain meds kick in?
It tastes nice
YOUUUU FUCKING FURRYYYY
I DIDN'T COME HERE TO BE SLANDERED LIKE THIS
I'm doing my drinking workout. 20 pushups for each beer I finish. I should write a fucking book
Randomize
