You're boyfriend is farting in his sleep. The last one sounded like a threat.
She looked like Sean Connery with cleft lip. So to answer your question, yes I put it in her butt.
As im putting my laundry in the machine, i find a solo cup and a pong ball that i signed babe ruth
My sheets, bed, and bathroom are covered in blood. She needed 14 stitches after a trip to ER. This is the last white girl I ever hookup with.
he went to find a bathroom and came back 10 minutes later with a fifth of bacardi, a pack of cigarettes, and two funnel cakes. he is a man among boys.
I've done nothing but whore my gay ex bf out for the past 48 hours. It's getting weird.
laying naked on couch sucking water through straw. i can still feel the orgasm from last night. thank you mdma.
he fucked me so hard i could feel my pelvis shifting. like i legit feel more prepared for childirth now
The boat wouldn't start, so we brought it back to her house and we've been sitting in it in her driveway for the past 5 hours drinking beer and yelling at peoplee.
I just want to be naked all the time but not in a sexual, come-hither and look at my ass sort of way. In a slightly chubby yet not ashamed way as I eat Taco Bell and lay on soft fuzzy blankets.
The ranger made you choose between a ticket and pouring all the beer out since it was a state park.
I've never seen you that close to tears as you poured out 30 beers.
I forgot my backup drink is supposed to be pedialyte and vodka. Add in the shit I'm losing as I drink. Win-Win right?
Just because you got dumped by some loser doeant mean you need Jesus. It just means you need better friends and some booze
found a note from drunk me saying "don't worry i fed the mice". WHAT MICE?
So...I'm pretty sure I have officially determined that reverse cowgirl is the only position possible to have sex in my smart four two
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