I specifically asked you not to be slutty tonight.
he said he wished he had more hands so he could firmly hold my boobs.
I don't understand how people can have that much vomit in them
Just once id like to sleep with a man who i havent thrown up on
this ms. usa coverage has sucessfully humbled every girl here. depressed fish in a leaky barrel. go!
So squirting runs in the family.
I just saw him carrying his little sister while walking his puppy. And he was shirtless. I swear my ovaries just exploded
You have no idea how pumped I am. I literally plan on dying. You're in my will
And they have kittens that decided that boobs are apparently the best arena for king of the hill...
Also, in the middle of me riding him, he said "I want you to dance on my dick" like I was supposed to know what that means
Maybe why that's why I'm perpetually single... I can't find a guy with bigger balls than mine.
If not, I can murder my liver twice...it's like a cat, it has 9 lives
Hey, what's the French word for when you meet your boyfriend's friend and you have that gut feeling that you smoked pot naked in a hot tub with him at a house party years ago?
& I came downstairs to find my whole family discussing the fact that I have a vibrator, which my mom found accidentally....
After returning from the hospital with lock-jaw from getting tackle at the game. Some naked chick busted out of his room and hit him with a devastating haymaker to the jaw because he wouldn't have sex
Randomize
