I just used my 2 drink stirrers as chopsticks to get a lime out of my drink. I really am Asian.
My hot female boss's cubical is right next to mine with a wall between us. Do you think it is too forward to make a glory hole in the wall?
I'm gonna vom. In the dentist chair. Who makes a dentist appt for July fucking 5th.
We decided to cut you off after you insisted on eating peanuts by the dumpster
having someone tell me to "prepare my vagina" is not really something I want to hear..
Miller High Life will be the death of me. Well, that and shower sex.
stuck in traffic next to occupy boston. smells like patchouli and unshaven pubes
I don't know what I wash first. My body or my puke painted car. People are judging me as I drive by.
Boats looked like robot pelicans and time was slow and now im on wipe out
I wasn't a groupie because I didn't carry his guitar home
I think that's the first time Navy dress blues and a Ninja Turtles onesie have been involved in the same makeout.
Yeah i was handcuffed to the bed all night but i actually slept like a baby
Omg last night I was giving shots out like I was the Willy Wonka of the alcohol world.
If you recall, I made a Zoolander reference almost immediately after you pulled out of me the first time we had sex.
Look, I know why you're asking me, but just because I'm gay does not make me a wiki on butt sex. Ask a doctor or you know, the internet like everyone else.
Randomize
