He asked me if I "almost moaned"
I just heard these 2 kids from flint and Detroit arguing over whose economy is worse... It's really sad what passes for competition in Michigan these days
The only bad thing about this relationship... my forearm strength is dwindling
you missed kickoff and the first round of bodyshots. I suggest you get here now.
Is there a word for someone who only has sex with NFL prospects?
He's going to regret telling me he doesn't care if i shave or not...
Someone want to explain the bottle of ranch I found in my pants
why is there a chinchilla in our apartment, and where did it come from?
question nothing. DON'T QUESTION A FREE CHINCHILLA.
Oh, that was the alley that I ate a pine cone in.
I now have a other guy willing to drive 3 hours for my vagina. At my next gyno appointment I'm asking her if there's cocaine in there.
What do you expect from her? Do you remember that creepy man she dated who saturated a pillowcase in his musky cologne and mailed it to her and she still slept with him.
Just get over here and light metaphorical fireworks in my literal vagina
I don't trust my subconscious. It sleeps with my exboyfriend sometimes.
It's not christmas until we're acting sober in front of grandma
The dogs decided to play a new game called "Who Can Scream the Loudest?"
I won.
Randomize
