i can't help myself.. i am just so in love with the kitchen manager.
...he was wearing JNCO shorts.. i'm pretty sure i saw the dragon.
you were calling yourself Ulickes S. Cunt.
My goal for the party is to get everyone in a diaper. Reasonable?
I told my ex i loved him and then he sent me a picture of this girl laying on his bed.
This situation is one cop call away from being a Lifetime movie.
He walked into the party with a case on one shoulder and a boom box on the other of course I fucked him
you dragged me by my throat over to the shots. this is a new level of alcoholism..
My dad just gifted me an alaskan flag he stole from the govenor's mansion. He said it was to hang on the wall at 3316, to start a morning ritual. Then he mimed kegstands and vomiting. Senior year will be epic.
They're pole dancing on a handicap sign post.
I woke up smelling like the ciroc you tried pouring into my mouth last night. I think my clothes are still soaked
I think that means you're growing up...when your coke nail becomes your opening mail nail.
Sorry bud. Having a shitty day because the GF broke up with my wife and I. We really liked her too
I literally just force feed a guy flintstone vitamins after sex
THE FASTEST WAY TO MY HEART IS THROUGH FAMILY SIZED BAGS OF GENERIC BRAND CHEESE BALLS
You told your family you're bi over the phone?!
We were talking about exes and it just came out....and so did I.
Randomize
