I don't make mistakes...just understandable bad choices.
Im watching he's just not that into you, eating way too much pizza, and feeling very single.
Con: they had to cauterize my wound twice. Pro: The docs agreed I'll be able to get really drunk tonight since I've lost so much blood.
sound pretty economical
It's not fair. Guys with dicks that huge should not be allowed to be catholic.
How sober do you have to be to donate blood?
Who faxed a picture of their penis to the office printer?!
i'm sick of coming in second next to bourbon.
i just had a pap smear and two shots. lets hit the beach.
My hanfda are one with the u niverse and I am cirretnly inhaling a couch
Your cock is gonna weep like a baby
I can't turn my head to the left, I'm pissing out of my ass, and my finger went through the toilet paper today... I need you.
Just had a flashback to Friday. Definitely had my hands in someone's bra. Definitely wasn't mine.
I miss you, too. It's hard to sleep without anything licking my head.
you smell like cheap hookers & chicken nuggets.
I got fucked in a bat mobile this morning. Being slutty rules.
Randomize
