So I think we're almost at the age where we should start calling boys men. Now what age do they start living up to the new title?
Most never. Some around 65.
who the fuck tagged pancake nipples on my profile picture?
He cant even get with danielle. Thats like striking out in t-ball
You proceeded to call me a hoe and then informed me that Bear Grylls is and always will be more important than I am to you.
I couldnt decide if i wanted to pee first or vomit. So i Peed sideways while throwing up into the tub.
Just saw a crackhead get taken down by pd in the canal. Its offically spring
Today my mom told me "that's what worries me about you getting blacked out drunk... You don't look pretty"
We fist bumped behind their backs while drunk hooking up with them... Do other girls do this too? Or is it just us?
I just made cupcakes.... Vodka icing. Results in the morning.
THE MAINTENANCE MEN WERE DOWN STAIRS AND I THOUGHT THEY WERE MY MOM. I'VE BEEN YELLING 'GRILL ME A CHEESE' AT THEM FOR HALF AN HOUR
Not only did my parents pick me up from his hotel room in the morning, but he also came outside and had a casual little chat with my dad through the driver's side windrow.
Tomorrow I need you to slap me in the face. I'll explain then
tuscaloosa is terrifying
like people here are just empty shells of drugs and sin
there is no mercy here
then you dropped a clam in a draught beer like it was a drop shot and and started chugging as beer spewed all over your body.
Just woke up and read the text that drunk me sent you, i take it all back, and you can't have my power puff girl pillow either.
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